Reflections on Parenting: Father’s Day

With Father’s Day approaching, I wanted to take some time to reflect on fatherhood. Although I am not a father myself, I have a father, and I am watching my husband grow as a father, and of course, we all have the loving example of our Heavenly Father.

What makes a father? I know I am one of the lucky ones who grew up with a loving father who was present and who cared for his family. Sadly, the reality is that not everyone has been blessed with that story. Yet even people who had biological fathers who let them down still had people in their lives who filled the role to some extent. So, I would say that a father figure, whether biological father or not, is the best example of what a father on Earth looks like. 

Father figures are steadfast men who show little boys what they should aspire to be and little girls how they should be treated. Father figures show us some facet or facets of Divine Fatherhood: perhaps it is that caring provision, perhaps it is patience, perhaps protection, it could be might and power, maybe they make things with their hands, or some other quality that reflects God.

Watching my husband learn how to parent has been an immense joy – one that I never really thought about before the birth of our child, so it took me by surprise and continues to delight me. One of the things I appreciate the most about him is that he is a generous provider. He gives a lot to and for our family in a big way and I am so grateful to the Lord for giving him a provider’s heart – it’s something he showed me even before we were married and reminds me a lot of my own father. It’s not even the finances that I appreciate and admire (although he is the breadwinner and we wouldn’t have an income without him), but rather, his attitude to providing. He gladly provides for our family, and for me, so that I can focus on other things, primarily caring for our child, but also for looking after the household admin and that kind of thing. This provider role is what I’d like to look at today.

The actions of a father who provides in this way call to mind the passage in the Gospel of Matthew:

“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air; they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And can any of you by worrying add a single hour to your span of life? And why do you worry about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow; they neither toil nor spin, yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not clothed like one of these. But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which is alive today and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? Therefore do not worry, saying, ‘What will we eat?’ or ‘What will we drink?’ or ‘What will we wear?’ For it is the Gentiles who strive for all these things; and indeed your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things. But strive first for the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. (Matthew 6:25-33)

God provides for us so that we can focus on glorifying Him and bringing forth His kingdom. Our hearts and minds should not be occupied by thoughts of necessity. Trust in the Lord and give your worries over to him. I know it is hard and sometimes scary to give up control, especially when it comes to our needs, but giving it up to God is the only way to let Him do His work in your life.

A while ago, I heard the story that actor Jonathan Roumie shared about his acting career prior to taking a role on The Chosen. He had spent eight years in Hollywood, working hard and giving everything his all, trying to get his acting career successfully going. But as much as he tried, nothing was happening. He was down to his last $20, no food in the fridge, no way to pay the rent the following week – it was dire. This was the point where he literally fell to his knees and gave it up to God – and it turned around. The following day, the actor claims that he spent the $20 probably on a good breakfast, and left it all up to God. He got home that day to four envelopes in the mail – each one contained a cheque for him. As he opened them, the amount on each cheque was bigger than the last. He added them up and found he had $1100. And as many of you might know, his success, both with The Chosen and in other projects, continues today.

Giving your life to God doesn’t necessarily mean that He’ll suddenly transport you to a new place in life and everything will magically fall into place. Sometimes it looks that way, but sometimes it requires cooperation and hard work on your part, just like how God required the Israelites to fight battles and move as God commanded them to move in order to get to the promised land. But, little by little, and slowly, He will change your heart.

Just as He taught first the world justice through the law that he gave to Moses, and then mercy through our Lord, he teaches us step-by-step, meeting us where we are and then leading us to something greater. Giving any aspect of your life to God puts Him in the position not of a slave driver cracking a whip, but of a loving father teaching their child a new skill. God will go at His child’s pace, pushing them just a little outside of their comfort zone when they are ready to progress, helping them to grow. And as His children, our role is to trust Him and do what He says.

When we trust in the Lord, when we hand Him the reins, amazing things can happen. God will work wonders through us, if we let Him. Perhaps this fathers day is a call, as cliché as it is, to let go and let God. He will look after our needs, let us be humble enough to let Him provide for us so that we can work for His kingdom in the way He has called each one of us to do.

How have you seen God acting in your life as your Heavenly Father? Has there been a time when you gave your life or a part of your life to God and truly seen His hand at work? I would love to hear those stories!

Until next time, let’s pray for each other. And remember, we can do Mom things through Christ who strengthens us!